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Mid-Year Re-Direction Journaling through unanswered prayer

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Mid-Year Re-Direction Journaling through unanswered prayer

Have this happened to you. Years ago there was a position I wanted badly.

I won’t share the exact details because it does not really matter anymore. What matters is that I prayed for it for months. I prayed the kind of prayers where you are so terribly specific with God that you are essentially handing Him a fully reconciled purchase order. I prayed with Scripture. I prayed with hot tears. I prayed with a particular brand of desperation that masquerades beautifully as faith but is really just control dressed in its Sunday best.

I did not get it.

The door closed. Quietly. There was no dramatic rejection, no tidy explanation just a silence that slowly stretched into a definitive no. With this I sat on my bed and said to God out loud in the empty room “I do not understand.”

He did not explain.

That was a couple of years ago. I can see now, standing firmly where I stand today that if He had signed off on my little purchase order, I would have entirely missed what He was actually building. The closed door was not a punishment. It was a protection. A redirection wrapped in the heavy disguise of a rejection.

I could not see that at the time at the time it just hurt.

I suspect some of you are sitting in that exact same place right now. Halfway through the year, leaning against a closed door with absolutely no explanation pinned to the wood.

This week is for you.

The Theology of the Closed Door

We do not talk about closed doors very well. In our faith spaces we love an open door. We celebrate them, we call them blessings, breakthroughs and answered prayers.

But closed doors? We rush right past them. We spiritualise the pain with phrases like “God’s timing,” “it wasn’t meant to be,” and “He has something better.” while all of those things might be entirely true they are spectacularly unhelpful at 3am when the door you were counting on has just shut in your face leaving your heart on the floor.

“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.” — Proverbs 16:9

Read that again. We plan. He establishes. We draw the careful, colour-coded map. He chooses the road. Sometimes His road runs through places our map never included. Through the valley we did not want. Past the door we were so certain was ours.

Notice that the verse does not say He ruins our plans. It says He establishes our steps. Establishes. That is a word of foundation of firm ground of something solid beneath your feet, even when the path looks absolutely nothing like what you expected.

Maybe the closed door is not the absence of God’s plan. Maybe it is the truest evidence of it.

The Closed Door Audit

Open your journal. Write down three things from this year that did not go the way you planned.

They do not need to be earth-shattering. A closed door is not always a job lost or a relationship ended. Sometimes it is a plan that quietly fell apart. A conversation that went sideways. A hope that dimmed. A prayer that sits unanswered on the shelf.

For each one, write two simple sentences:

  • What I wanted:
  • What might have been protected:

That second sentence is the hard one. Because for some of your closed doors, you cannot see the protection yet. And that is okay. You do not need to see it to write it. You just need to consider the possibility. To hold space for the idea that God was in the redirect, even if you cannot trace His fingerprints quite yet.

If you cannot write the second sentence, write this instead:

“I do not see the protection yet. But I am choosing to trust that it exists.”

That is not wishful thinking. That is faith. The kind that holds on in the dark without demanding proof.

The Unopened Door

There is another kind of door that the mid-year pause brings into sharp focus. Not the door that closed, but the door you simply have not opened. The one you keep walking past. The one that clearly has your name on it but you pretend you do not see it because opening it would require something of you that you aren’t sure you have.

A conversation you need to start. A boundary you need to finally set. A dream you buried because someone once told you it was silly. A calling that keeps tapping you gently on the shoulder while you pretend it is just the wind.

“Behold, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.” — Revelation 3:8

What if the door you are most afraid of is the exact one God placed there just for you?

Write about it today. You do not need to open it this week. You just need to acknowledge it.

“The door I keep walking past is…”

Name it. Look at it. Let it exist on the page. That is step one. The opening comes later. When you are ready. When the still waters have done their quiet work and your soul is rested enough to finally reach for the handle.

A Prayer of Surrender

This week, I want you to write a prayer of surrender for one specific thing. Not a sweeping “I surrender all” prayer. Those are beautiful but they are easy because they are vague.

This must be specific. This is one thing. One closed door. One unanswered prayer. One redirect you did not choose.

“God, I wanted ___. You had something else. I do not understand it. But I am choosing to open my hands.”

Open your actual hands when you write it. Rest your palms facing up on the desk next to your journal. Let your physical body mirror the prayer. There is something profoundly holy about unclenching your fists that allows something much deeper inside you to unclench, too.

You are not giving up. You are giving over. And there is a world of difference between the two.

With so much grace,

Debbera

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Debbera, Litsje

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